ThePackagePirate'sNightmare

A smart outdoor security hub that looks like harmless garden decor — until it's not. AI-powered threat detection meets precision non-lethal deterrence.

The Gazebo Moment

When Your Garden Ornament Goes Full Clown Mode

A porch pirate creeps up to steal a package, when suddenly this innocent-looking garden ornament spins 180°, erupts in blinding kaleidoscope lights, blasts circus music at 120 decibels, and tags their face with neon UV dye visible on police bodycam footage — all while livestreaming to your phone and ten neighbors.

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AI Threat Detection

Distinguishes delivery personnel from threats with computer vision. Knows the difference between a friendly USPS carrier and someone casing your porch.

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Clown Mode

Disorienting strobe-and-siren system triggers instantly. Blinding lights, circus music, and chaos that sends thieves running.

UV Dye Marking

Precision non-lethal deterrent tags perpetrators with UV-visible dye. Law enforcement can identify suspects even days later.

Simple Pricing. Serious Protection.

Gazebo Starter

$399 + $9.99/mo
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Targeting 50 million U.S. households that have experienced package theft.
Home insurance partners offering premium discounts for Gazebo customers.